Choosing Happiness Amidst Chaos: Practical Strategies for Uncertain Times

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Hello and welcome to this week's Choosing Happy Podcast, where I'm going to explore not only navigating change so you can thrive in uncertain times, but also looking at resilience.

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How we can decide between what we're resisting and what we should be doing and whether we're all being challenged right now on a spiritual level to really expand into our true calling, our own expanded consciousness as we move into a new era for humanity.

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It's great, really to be alive at this time.

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So stay tuned and we're going to go deep and explore so much more on this week's Choosing Happy Podcast.

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Foreign welcome back to the Choosing Happy Podcast.

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I'm Heather Masters, and today we're diving into a couple of topics that affect us all.

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And I think right now, with everything that's happening in our lives and around the world, navigating change and thriving in uncertainty is probably top of mind for many people.

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Whether it's your job, whether you're going through relationship shift, whether you've unfortunately lost someone, whether it's something in your personal life, whether it's the whole global shift that's taking place, uncertainty can feel overwhelming.

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But what if we could work with that and create an opportunity for growth, for expansion of consciousness, and for stepping into who we truly are?

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In this episode, I'll explore how we can embrace change, develop resilience, and find joy even when the future feels dark and uncertain.

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So grab a cup of tea and get comfy and let's get started.

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I want to, first of all, talk about change and what change really is.

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That's a natural part of life.

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You know, it's something that is certain.

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Change and death are the two certainties in life.

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And change can be big or it can be small.

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It can be expected or unexpected.

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And personally, and as I say, this is just my opinion, I think we're all being called to learn to live with uncertainty.

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Everything has become turned upside down.

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Everything's chaotic, everything's shifting and changing between what's true, what's not true, what's hidden, what's clear, what works, what doesn't work anymore.

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There is no normal anymore.

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Daily things are happening that, you know, even a few years ago we would have said was impossible to happen.

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go forward into the new year: 2025

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I think one of the most challenging things about change is that we resist it.

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And resistance, if you listened to my Wednesday Woo episode yesterday can really cause us problems.

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And it's trying to work out whether that resistance is because we shouldn't do something or because our ego is stopping us from doing the very thing we're destined for.

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And change can trigger fear and anxiety because it disrupts our comfort zones.

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We like to stay comfortable and unfortunately, over the last couple of decades, we've really got stuck and being comfortable.

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We want everything done immediately, if not yesterday.

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And we don't want it done the way we want it, and we don't want to have to do anything to get it there.

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So we thrive on things being comfortable, on other people helping out, on services being available, and we thrive on predictability.

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It gives us a sense of control.

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But when things break down and life throws us curveballs, it's easy to feel lost.

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And I think we're on the brink globally where there is going to be a huge curveball and any sense of control we may have had will be lost for a month or two.

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And that's why I'm really focusing in on this episode as ways you can navigate change and uncertainty.

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Getting comfortable with uncertainty, getting comfortable with taking responsibility for the reality of the now moment is something that will empower you and really help you thrive.

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So some of the benefits of embracing change let's kind of flip the script a bit.

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Let's view change as something positive.

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What's if we take on the belief that life is working for us, that things have to collapse before the world gets better, then we can look at the opportunity that are being brought to us.

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Change can often bring growth opportunities where it pushes us out of our comfort zones and encourages not just personal growth, but expansion of consciousness and expansion of everything we believe we can do.

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Something that I think I've quoted three times this week but that, you know, scientific studies show that we're only generally operating in it 40% of your potential.

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So what if we even increase that potential by 5 to 10%?

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Think of what you could do beyond that.

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And also if you're kind of disagreeing with that, sit down and ask yourself, just sit quiet and ask yourself, what percentage of my potential am I operating at and see what the figure is for you and what difference it would make if you could grow and expand into your potential.

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You could use more of you and do it in a way that kind of aligns with your energy so you're not more tired because sometimes not using all of our potential as resistance.

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So we're probably more tired by not using our potential and Stepping into it.

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So have a think about that and, you know, other new perspectives you can take.

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When you encounter new situations, you can gain fresh perspectives.

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You can choose to see things differently.

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You can enrich your understanding of yourself and the world around you by looking at a change and looking at it from different angles, rather than being involved and emotionally attached.

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Trying to take that neutral observer perspective and choosing a perspective that works for you in terms of if the universe is working for me, if life is working for me, then what perspective is going to be the highest one I can take to move through this and to move through this positively?

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Change brings about increased resilience.

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Each time we move through change, whether it's negative, whether it's a challenge, every time we navigate, navigate it successfully, we build resilience.

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It means that we've learned that our neurology is learned so that the next time life throws us a challenge, we're better equipped to handle it.

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And sometimes that's hard to believe, especially when you know you've maybe had a challenge that kind of brings you to your knees.

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You think you're not going to get over it, but then a couple of years down the line, when you look back at that, maybe that challenge doesn't seem so big after all.

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So let's move on to looking at some strategies that we can use to navigate change and to build our resilience.

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I'll go through some that have worked for me and some that are kind of recommended, and I'll let you know if I've tried them or not.

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The first one is acknowledging where you are.

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So one of the greatest problems around challenges is our refusal to accept where we are.

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We can only be disappointed and we can only have dissonance and kind of aggression towards ourselves if where we are isn't where we thought we'd be.

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So acknowledging where you are and accepting it, because you can't change where you are in terms of if you're not where you had the expectations of being and you're not there yet, being frustrated that you're not there yet isn't really helpful.

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Acknowledging, okay, I'm not where I wanted to be, but I am here gives you that power to choose what to do next, rather than being caught in this dissonance of I don't know what to do because I should have been here, because that should is kind of keeping you stuck.

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So acknowledging where you are and acknowledging your feelings around where you are and acknowledging your feelings as they arise during different times of change is really, really important.

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It's about allowing them.

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So feel the sadness, feel the excitement, feel the fear.

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The key though is to acknowledge it, but not to hold on to it, not to dwell in it, to allow it to notice it so much that you're noticing where it is in your body and you're taking that time to have that awareness that yes, I'm feeling sad.

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Because if you've ever done any mindfulness techniques, you know that emotions flow, there's energy in motion and the idea is to allow it to flow through you.

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Yes, it may repeat, but then again allow it to flow through you.

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We've all been kind of trained to hold our emotions down, but in that resistance and that holding that emotion is actually what causes blockages and long term stress and dis ease.

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The next thing to do is to focus on what you control.

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So you have acknowledged where you're at, you've acknowledged your feelings.

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You can now look at what you can control and what's out of your control and be realistic about it.

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Sometimes we like to believe we can control things that actually we just can't touch and it's not for us to do.

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And then in certain times it's easy to feel overwhelmed by everything that's happening around you.

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So focus on the things that you can control, your reactions and your mindset, and create small goals that empower you to take action, that allow you to take steps forward and also take the time to celebrate those actions.

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Because as you celebrate, you're building your resilience, you're training your neurology, you're training your unconscious mind to understand that you are succeeding and it'll look for more success and encourage you to move forward.

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The next one is to stay connected with friends and family and with people who have shared experiences that can provide support and perspective.

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It often feels that we're really alone, especially in the darkest times.

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But there are other people out there who've gone on a similar journey.

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And I know that not everyone is perhaps as helpful and compassionate as they could be.

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But sometimes if you reach out, even if it's online, you can find someone who resonates with your story and who is there to, if nothing else, just hold that space for you, to let you know that you aren't alone, that there are others going through the same thing.

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Now this is something that I'm going to add and it might be unpopular, but if you're going through something, telling your story once, twice, even three times is kind of okay.

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We kind of expect that.

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But if you're still telling the Same story, six months on.

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You're holding yourself back, you're holding on to those emotions, you're holding on to that narrative and you're not allowing yourself to grow and move through the change.

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And I know some things are hard to let go of.

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I'm not talking about, you know, potentially trauma or PTSD here because that's completely different game altogether.

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But if you're, you know, and I know that that grief is something that takes time as well, but I'm talking about creating a story that holds the negative in place, that keeps you in the darkness and in depression.

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So just be aware of that because not only are you creating that for yourself, you're creating it for those who are trying to support you.

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And if my, if I've gone through something similar, I don't want to have to lower my energy back to where you are.

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I don't want to have to relive it again.

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So just be mindful of the story you're telling yourself and your friends and that it is possible to move through these things.

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But you've got to be aware of the story that you're creating.

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And words are powerful, words are spells and remember that.

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So you're trapping yourself into a spell by reiterating and telling yourself that this story is still true for you.

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Having said that, you know, the most important thing is to also practice self compassion.

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So be kind to yourself as you navigate through uncertainty.

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And it's okay to struggle.

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It's part of being human.

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It's allowing the struggle again.

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It's about not holding on to a certain story because that will keep you there, rewrite your story.

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You know, one of the things I'm doing at the moment is creating a journaling, a 30 day journaling journey specifically around this, because it is about taking the opportunity to create a different story for yourself.

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And I know it's hard when you've lost people you don't want.

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You know, you think if you let the story go, you let them go, but that's not really true.

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And I know, I know it's a probably a common question, but what would they want for you?

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Would they want you to be suffering?

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Would they want you to be beating yourself up still?

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And I know about survivors guilt, I know about feeling guilty that you're left behind or blaming yourself that someone else has gone, that it should have been you.

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I've been there so many times and I know it's a difficult place, but actually being compassionate for yourself would be to treat yourself as if you were a friend facing similar challenges.

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You wouldn't want to keep them stuck in the story.

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You wouldn't want to keep reminding them of how guilty they feel or should be when that's actually not true.

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So you know, have the compassion not to do that same thing to yourself.

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The last one for now is embracing flexibility.

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And I think this is so, so powerful for what we're, we're, we're going through now and going forward.

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Over the last four years everything has changed and everything is unpredictable and getting more unpredictable by the day.

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So cultivating that flexibility, that agility is really, really key.

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In neuro linguistic programming there is a presupposition that the most flexible and adaptable will survive the longest.

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And I think that's very true where we are.

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So learn to be flexible in your plans and expectations.

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Learn to, you know, adapt more easily when changes occur.

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Now having said that, there is something that I've noticed in being adaptable and flexible and learning to do that still have your boundaries, having your boundaries is really, really key because I have noticed that I toler much more rubbish than I used to because it's under the title of flexibility and adaptability but in doing so I've probably dropped before below that 40% for potential because I've adapted and become flexible and a lower, I was going to say a lower vibration.

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That's not true.

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It's a lower.

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I've lowered my expectations of myself to fit in with others expectations over the years and I haven't after moving out of those situations I haven't really raised them again.

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I'm doing that now.

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I'm in the process of doing that and have been for the last sort of six months.

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But it was something that I really, really noticed that if we adapt and are flexible.

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So for instance I was caring for my parents so I had to be and do and my values had to change while doing that job.

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So coming out of that it's as I said earlier, it's quite difficult sometimes to immediately come out and be who you were before because you've created a new story, a new version of yourself.

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And if you do that over time you, you're building pathways, you're building your unconscious mind to have certain expectations.

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So be aware of boundaries of what you're willing to tolerate for yourself and for others as well.

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And just another personal story in terms of embracing that flexibility and breaking through those, this kind of limiting boundaries that I'd set myself because I'd adapted downwards that I've been faced with a significant career change over the last few years.

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And it can be terrifying, especially as an entrepreneur, to be putting out sales, to be putting out courses, and to showing up on, for instance, on lives and on media.

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It wasn't something, as an elder person that, you know, I was brought up to do.

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I wasn't brought up in an age where everyone was taking pictures and taking videos.

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That wasn't what we did.

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It wasn't part of my conditioning, if you like.

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So pursuing something like podcasting, deciding to go live three times a week, you know, I've been terrified.

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And looking at the figures and looking at the stats and.

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And still keeping going has been really, really challenging, especially for the podcast, because it's.

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It's one of those areas where getting feedback is quite difficult.

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So I.

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I don't get the feedback to know whether what I'm doing is really well received or not.

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You know, people may listen, and they may only listen for a few minutes, so it's really difficult to tell, which is why, you know, I kind of ask people if you could like or share or leave me a comment, that would be brilliant, because otherwise, it's difficult to know how the show is going.

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So I focus on what I can control.

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I set small goals for myself each week, like researching topics or finding guests that maybe go in with a theme that I'm working with.

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And I've been gradually building my confidence.

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And actually, this week, I feel like I've crossed another barrier and I have learned to be more myself.

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And I've got support systems in place that are now helping me, and I'm putting more support systems in place to help me grow my brand, my podcast, my presence, so that I can meet my vision, my goal of helping over a million people around the world as we go through these rough and tough times.

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Focus on the positive, focus on rebuilding their lives and the lives of others, and focus on leaving a legacy for humanity where it's a choice of not just happiness, but of being resilient, of having critical thoughts, of being free to speak, of loving life, of embracing every day, of feeling healthy and motivated and really finding joy in however we find joy for our lives.

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So I keep going, and I keep leaping into uncertainty.

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I took a couple of leaps recently, and they're just starting to pay off.

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So watch this space.

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As we wrap up today's episode, I just want to remind you that navigating change is not just about surviving.

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It is about thriving amidst uncertainty.

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And as I said earlier, you know, those boundaries and what we tolerate.

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You've got to decide that you're not going to tolerate survival anymore, that you want to thrive and that you can thrive and really explore the possibilities and your potential.

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Asking that potential question can open up possibilities.

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Because if you actually sit and just allow and kind of brainstorm, what could you do if you opened up to more potential?

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What opportunities can you embrace?

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You know, change allows opportunities, possibilities for us to move forward into greater potential and expansion.

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So will you allow yourself to grow through change and to grow through the process?

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And if you're currently facing a change in your life, I encourage you to reflect on this session on the strategies and see how they might apply in your situation.

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I hope this has been really helpful.

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And if there is someone else you think that's out there could benefit from listening, then Please do pass this episode on and thank you for joining me today on Choosing Happy and if you found it valuable, please do like please leave me a comment, leave me a review, and don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode.

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Until next time, keep Choosing Happiness.

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Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to this week's episode.

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If you enjoyed it or think it would be valuable to others, please do share.

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And if you really enjoyed it, please leave me a review.

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It really helps the podcast.

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All of the links are in the show notes and I look forward to seeing you next week on the Choosing Happy podcast.